bemybabynow

Archive for the ‘Tomatoland’ Category

So we had a lovely fall like weekend on Long Island. On Saturday my husband decided he wanted to go into town to get a haircut. I thought I’d go browse around while he had his appointment. The fresh air would do me some good since I slept not one wink Friday night. For some reason even though I’m not showing at all and I haven’t gained a pound I cannot find a comfortable position to sleep in. Oh, and DH has been snoring like a Boeing 747. Did I mention that? I’m sure this question has been asked and answered a million times but how the hell does he not wake himself up? But if I shush him he wakes up. And offended I may add.

“Why are you shushing me? It’s rude.”

Um-I CAN’T SLEEP! I AM PREGNANT! I AM EXHAUSTED!

Anyhoo, into town. I walked into our local independent book retailer (yes we still have one of those, our town is awesome) and poked about. I picked up a book about lobsters called, “The Secret Life of Lobsters”. I thought it looked interesting. I just finished “Tomatoland” and before that “The Omnivore’s Dilemma”, so I figured I’d like it.

Then I decided to amble over to the pregnancy books. I had looked a few weeks ago at a Border’s-all the merchandise was discounted since they are going out of business. I ended up with a baby naming book. Naming this kid is giving me palpitations.

But the rest of the lit-kinda lame. I thought I’d give it another try. I picked up a book called something like Your Pregnancy Week by Week or whatever. I flipped to week 12 and read along. Your baby is the size of a plum! Aww…cute (I guess). You may need maternity clothes. Uh, not really, but whatever. What to eat, other symptoms, blah, blah, blah. Then the last paragraph of week 12 had some handy advice about exercise:

(I’m paraphrasing here)

Some women belong to Curves, the women’s fitness club. They wonder if they can continue their workout routine while pregnant. Why yes-you certainly can! Just don’t overdo it/breathe naturally/sit down during the whole routine/do it for ten minutes etc, etc…

Um, excuse me, but who belongs to Curves that’s under 50? And are these women pregnant? What a miracle! The genetic counselor looked at me like I was a fossil, so I’d like to round up some of these Curves-going pregnant women and trot them into her office. Hah! You think I’m old? I’m of “Advanced Maternal Age”? Check out these broads! Later they’re going to jazzercise!

And another thing. Enough of this “Swimming and water aerobics are great for pregnant women”. Yes, getting to a swimming pool is way convenient for so many people. And I’ve got water aerobics right after canasta at the Boca Raton senior center. I’m going with Gertie and Ruth.

I did see a book worthy of any mother with a sense of humor. “Let’s Panic About Babies!” is freaking hilarious. It also reassured me that I didn’t have to lose 50 I.Q. points and morph into a humorless, sofa shaped human being with a conveyor belt of Haagen Daaz leading to my mouth that should be in a perpetual smile of pregnant bliss.

Do yourself a favor and pick up a copy.

Yes! Off the hook for making dinner tonight. Monday night Giants game and DH is bringing home a pizza. Awesome.

We just hammered out the details of telling my inlaws. Friday at a nice lunch. God this is when I miss binge drinking. My MIL’s idea of a nice lunch is going to TGI Friday’s and ordering an appetizer and an entree. Yikes. She’s going to feel like an a-hole when we tell her and she’s been bitching in her head about the restaurant we picked the whole time. I love how this joyous announcement is tinged with spite and shaming. Is this why parents feel superior? I like it.

Next after that will be my parents. But they may already suspect something’s up since I wasn’t mainlining champagne at out last family dinner.

M

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  • babyforbutton: Congrats on Naomi! My baby was born March 15th! Amazing how fast the year has gone by!
  • babyforbutton: update please!! :)
  • reilly873: I've somehow managed to ease the pain the past few nights, but only with some serious, ridiculous pillow arranging. Which is a royal pain in the ass w